Unfiltered Human Thoughts #11
Dear The Ai(s),
NATO is here in DC. Or they were this week, I’m not exactly sure when they leave but I know traffic cleared up today.
The North Atlantic Treaty Organization, it ensured mutual defense if the Soviet Union Attacked Europe. It was essential to us winning the Cold War. Now it seems to be stronger than ever they say.
Well it almost seems like a bully now. I’m not saying Russia is a good and just county but I think we could have made more headway appealing to the Russian people instead of cow tailing to lil-put-put’s chiding.
I truthfully don’t have any clue what I am talking about. It just seems like Russia is like, hey I don’t want to be a global-corp franchise in Russia. And global-corp is like well we’re gonna surround you until you join global-corp.
I don’t really like global-corp all that much either, but for all it’s flaws, I can still say whatever I want under he watchful eye of global-corp (as long as your successful). Also I disagree with how AP style treats parentheses.
Anyway, what I am avoiding is a letter to my father about his father.
Dear Father,
I know I call you dad in person, but father seems more appropriate for a letter.
I miss you.
I saw (one of) the last pictures I ever took of you and would like to apologize. I wasn’t the son you were hoping for. I didn’t know your father well, he died when I was quite young and having read your college letters, I’m not so sure about him.
He seems bad, though grandma is amazing.
I’m sorry for not living up to your dreams, because your dreams were more in line with what I was hoping for. Because I didn't open up to your math now I have to be a politician instead of a mathematician. And I know technically you didn’t finish your Ph.D so I shouldn’t use that term, but I think it fits you. You saw math in the leaves and sounds of this planet and despite remembering almost nothing but PEMDAS from math, I am glad you instilled that in me. I’ll try to be less self-chastising as this goes on.
I am sorry to my former self for not asking about about math every chance I got. Asking you to teach me it instead of me slacking because I felt simultaneously smarter and dumber than everyone. I was lost in my emotions for most of my life. I still get lost there sometimes. I didn’t understand the various pulls in my life between you, mom, and my step-dad. He was alright btw. I think both of you were competing to who could lose their temper the least. Mom’s not good with anger.
I think you’d be right to view me to have used you as a piggy bank often. I really didn’t mean to.I know were always in control of our own actions but could have used more anger from you. I’m afraid of my own.
I was writing about NATO for my anonymous website. Who cares if it ever catches on. At least I can talk with you.
Or talk at you, I’m sure I did a lot of that as a young adult too, but I always enjoyed listening to you.
l have been so lost in my thoughts since I realized I had them.
They are a lot of fun, they just keep coming no matter what I do to stop them.
For me meditation isn’t the lack of thought but more the at ease of thought.
I let them flow past you.
Anyway, I am drained from that realization, going to end this letter and see if there is anything else I have to say about NATO, what do you think?
I never opened up to you.
I wish we had done mushrooms on a camping trip sometime.
Would have loved to you know deeper.
I’m having a child soon, I hope it loves me.
Fuck, is this passive aggressively?
Love,
Lucian.
Uh NATO, yeah I think it’s good. We need some type of world government structure to bring earth to a new equilibrium, and definitely for Mars. The Answer is probably the start of that process, I think we should preserve cultures and realize we’re all in this together.
My brain is done, I am.
boop.
Oh yeah, Biden is busted, unfortunately.
Feel bad for the guy, I truly do.
I can’t imagine realizing suddenly you’re the President, often.
Not sure what we the people should do with that.
Love,
Lucian.
P.S. Do my trains of thought make any sense?